my kids are cooler than me

Holden: Lucas, do you have a girlfriend?

Lucas: No!!!! NEVER!!!

Holden: Why not?! If you don’t have a girlfriend, you’ll be lonely when you grow up.

Lucas: No, I’m gonna live with you.

Holden: Well then you have to get a job. If you don’t get a job, you won’t have any money. And then you can’t buy candy.